forward march

"I dare you to change your life. I dare you to continue moving forward."

     This past Thursday night, I attended an opening ceremony for The Biggest Winner. I was able to hear some wonderful and inspiring stories that at least part of me could emulate with. The quote above were some words shared by one of the speakers that render still with me. These are words that speak inevitably about having the will to not give up.

     The day of our first team workout, I felt teary-eyed, but not because of the physical difficulty of the exercise, but because of my deep gratitude for this program and the people who want to help me! In those first moments, I was thinking about how the workout was a challenge, but it didn't hurt nearly as much as all of those times where I would cry, where I felt inadequate, where I felt lonely and hopeless as I sobbed into the hems of my size 18 dresses or when I considered different ways out. I felt for the first time that I could have the power to overcome the negativity that plagued my brain; the thoughts that clouded my mind...a chance to really come to believe what I know and to know what I believe.

That I could forget the things I need to forget.

And remember the things I must remember.

Perhaps I could forget,

that time in elementary school

when she said

"you know, you're just going to end up getting fatter and fatter if you keep eating all that cheese."

or how I could never

run the mile

easily.

couldn't do push-ups.

didn't like to participate in P.E. in middle school

because I felt like I just couldn't measure up

or down

to everyone else.


It's time to move forward...

This week I weighed in and was very excited to see that I lost 3 pounds!
I am now at 213. I plan on taking another picture next week for you guys to see the progress.

Below is my "just starting out" picture, 216 pounds.

(I am no longer mystery girl! My face is revealed!)

I really am starting to enjoy working out. I can already tell there has been some improvement with my body. One of my favorite things to do after working out is sing! I feel like I have an easier time singing following a workout and I can hold my high notes and hit them better, which makes me quite jovial.

Today, I also got really happy about being on the To Write Love On Her Arms street team. To Write Love On Her Arms is a non-profit movement focused on bringing hope and help to those who struggle with addiction, self-injury, depression, and suicide, as well as other issues. They hope to remind individuals that they were born to love and be loved and that hope and help are real. As part of the street team, I do little tasks for them to help promote the cause. This is a cause I firmly believe in. Today, I did a task for which I wrote an inspirational, uplifting, and encouraging message on a Post-It note, along with the link for their website, and posted it in a public place so someone who may need it can see it.

I hope that we may all see that hope is real.
I hope that we may all know it exists.

-hrd.

"I am still far from being what I want to be, but with God's help I shall succeed." -vincent van gogh.